Wednesday, June 25, 2008

F U, Floppers

So the NBA's gonna crack down on flopping next year, eh? That's good. For too long now, flopping motherfuckers have been rewarded for their bitchery by myopic refs (who are probably fixing games for the mob). Flopping's terrible for the sport. It slows down the pace, causes injuries, pisses off the fans. You don't even cheer your own players when they take a charge. It's like you're happy but embarrassed for them at the same time. Seriously, when was the last time you heard a fan yell 'Way to sell that contact, Varejao!' or 'Great reverse tackle, Ginobili'? That kind of behavior starts fights on the playground. But NBA refs keep calling it so floppers keep doing it.

And now comes this talk of reviewing tapes and penalizing obvious flops. Cool. Scoring will go up. Why? Defensive players will make more plays on the ball instead of sliding in underneath to draw charges; offensive players will attack the rim more knowing some coward isn't rushing over to stand under their legs when they land.

Last year's biggest flopper? A surprise, actually. D Fish of The Lakers with something like 50 offensive fouls taken. People usually think of Fish as a high-character guy. The Flop is anything but high-character. How about next year, they give an award out at the end of the season for most charges taken and call it The Floppy? Floppy Fisher's got a nice ring to it.

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