Saturday, May 16, 2009

It's Amazing, Unless It Isn't

It's amazing
It's called a craisin
It's a cranberry plus a raisin

Sorry, I took some liberties with Kanye's lyrics. Hearing a song eight million fucking times will do that to a person.

The NBA would have us believe that everything is amazing, apparently. But let's look at the facts, shall we? Is it amazing that the world-champion Boston Celtics, even without KG, beat the mediocre Chicago Bulls? Is it amazing that the #2 seed Denver Nuggets pilloried the decimated Hornets and heartless Mavericks? Is it amazing that the Cavaliers stomped the pathetic Pistons and dinged up Hawks?

No, none of these things are amazing.

What IS amazing is how quickly people are jumping on the Nuggets bandwagon. Charles Barkley's picking them to win the crown, showing the world why he lost so much money in Vegas over the years. What IS amazing is how many times the NBA runs 'where amazing happens' spots in the course of one broadcast. What IS amazing is that Rajon Rondo can punch Brad Miller in the face and not get suspended while Ron Artest gets kicked out for a harmless shove. What IS amazing is how many people are counting the Lakers out because they're having trouble finishing off the plucky Rockets. What IS amazing is seeing dorky white guys do the wing-flapping gesture to show their love for Birdman Andersen. What IS amazing is how many pundits are questioning the coaching philosophy of Phil Jackson while praising George Karl in the same breath. That's more than amazing; that's fucking mind blowing.

LA will handle Houston in Game 7 and then we get to see whether Dahntay Jones is the 'defensive stopper' he claims to be, whether Nene can guard an actual center with a pulse, and whether Denver can win a series without home court. I'm saying no-no-resounding no.

Pictured: Birdman preparing for a crash landing.

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