Tuesday, September 25, 2012

Time to Get Started: An Introduction.

Time to Get Started: An Introduction.

While doing some blog brainstorming the other day, Franklin (who, mercifully, will be losing his penname sometime in the very near future) and I realized that we never came up with a concrete definition of what constitutes a "Diss player".

You see, there is a certain pressure to carve an analytical niche for yourself if you are attempting to write about basketball on the internet.  There are many armchair basketball "experts" out there, and if you want to be included in their ranks, you need to find a way to talk about the game and produce analyses that will eventually set you apart from the rest of the herd.  The best blogs have done so by either using two separate but equally important (and intrinsically intertwined) methodologies: statistical analysis or discourse analysis.  Some great blogs do both, but by and large, the blogs (and bloggers) who have set themselves above the rest have used some sort of analytical talent to generate excellent content and provide different ways of looking at the game, and the players who play the game.


For example, a brilliant blog that has used statistical analysis to separate itself from others is the Wages of Wins Journal.  The Journal, founded and edited by economist/author Dave Berri and former Mavs' stats analyst Wayne Winston, has put invaluable work into assessing which statistics are most important when it comes to winning basketball games, and which players are the best at providing those valuable assets for winning ball clubs.  Statistics such as wins produced, win share, and adjusted plus/minus have illuminated the usefulness of a number of different skill-sets, and have glorified the efforts of players who heretofore were seen as little else members of a supporting cast.  Shane Battier's rise to prominence, at least in the world of analysis, is largely due to Dave Berri and The Wages of Wins.  And while they've doled out respect to the standard cast of All-Stars, they've also shown us why Landry Fields, Ronnie Brewer and Chuck Hayes deserve our praise as well.  I would argue that a Wages of Wins Player is a player who produces things that help teams win games (and more often than not, those things tend to be rebounds).

An equally brilliant blog -- and one that has gotten love from us before -- is the now-defunct FreeDarko. As Franklin asserted in his review of The Undisputed Guide to Pro Basketball History, FreeDarko focused on players whose careers told a good story, and who, through their play on the court, and their actions off the court, crafted a particular relationship between themselves and their fans.  Crafting an "emotional connection" with the game was of the utmost importance, and it seemed to help if the player's stylistic skillset made them valuable warriors in the positional revolution, a term coined by Bethlehem Shoals which referred to players who eschewed the traditional boundaries of positionality and did things on the court that made them unique, awe-inspiring, and above all, entertaining.  So while FreeDarko (who did their old fans a solid and released FreeDarko Player Rankings on Shoals' latest project, The Classical) loves stars like Rajon Rondo, Kevin Durant and Russell Westbrook, they also lust over guys like Ty Lawson, JaVale McGee and Paul George.  FreeDarko found brilliance in Gerald Green, Gilbert Arenas and Rashad McCants -- players whose skills disturbed traditionalists but delighted fans across the board.

With these towering monoliths of homegrown basketball analysis in mind, it seemed incumbent upon us, as small fish in a very big pond, to attempt to create an archetype that would define what a "Diss player" is.  Moreover, it seemed necessary that such a creation represent an "original" contribution to the larger field of basketball analysis, and would differ from the players preferred by other blogs.  Now, Voltaire was correct when he said that, "originality is but judicious imitation, and that "the most original writers borrowed one from another."  As such, it was inevitable that many of the criteria that defined favorite players of the blogs we admire will naturally be ours as well.  Our task, then, was to attempt to explain what exactly we liked about the players we liked, why we seemed to like it.  Additionally, it seemed important to tie statistical analysis into such a definition, in an attempt to provide a fuller picture into what makes a Diss player a Diss player in the first place.

A "Diss player", of course, is different from a "Diss guy".  Diss guys don't have to be current players, and if they are, it is not mandatory that we enjoy their style of play. In fact, Diss guys, by and large, have been defined by what they do off the court, rather than what they produce on the stat sheet, or on television.  Diss guys are simply meant to be celebrated for the things they do as basketball players and human-beings.  There is a certain glory in being a Diss guy, but it isn't permanent, and certainly not a defining trait.


Instead, a "Diss player", in its ideal form, refers to someone or something that apparently is a bit more complicated than a Diss guy (hence our inability to define it).  A Diss player can be analyzed broadly, but in fact, is beloved (and investigated) because he represents more esoteric, specific parts of the game that don't always appear on the stat sheet, or in articles describing what the player brings do his team or the league.  Diss players do not necessarily have to be "good" -- that is, they do not have to necessarily affect the game in a positive way, or really have a skill-set that dazzles the fans, or makes them feel emotional about anything in particular.  Their contributions don't have to come on the court, and they don't have to be lauded for efficiency, professionalism, candor, or any of the things that normal talking heads judge quality pros judge their players by.  None of these things are held in especially high regard.

Instead, I would argue that most important trait of a Diss player is that they are outspoken in some aspect of their professional or personal life. This does not necessarily have to be on the court, nor does it have to be to the media.  Instead, this "outspoken" quality must present itself in some way that distinguishes himself from the rest of his peers. The Diss has organically developed a distrust towards "quiet consistency" -- that is, players and organizations that do things too professionally, and simply become the sum of their stats.  We appreciate unapologetic performances of individuality; nay, we demand it from the players who we enjoy watching.  So in that vein, it seems necessary that a Diss player portrays himself -- both to his teammates, his fans, and the larger viewing audience who may or may not give a shit -- as a living, breathing human being. They are in many ways the anti-FreeDarko player, who are often compared to Greek gods or inanimate objects in their analysis.  Instead, a Diss player oftentimes seems too human: their shortcomings and failings as professionals, as well as their mistakes and quirks as a human, make them more relatable, and in many cases, more beloved.  And in the end, this, really, is how we like them best.


So for example, LeBron James, for all his faults, is clearly a Diss player.  His outspoken-ness takes many forms, most of it positive.  He is outspoken in his brilliance as one of the best players in the game, and is unafraid to use the full bevy of his talents to enable his team to win.  He has remained confident about his decision to leave his home state and the team that drafted him to join his friends and pursue excellence in Miami, and has altered his personality to become a better teammate, and in turn, a winner.  We saw his game mature as well -- gone were the lower percentage jump shots, replaced instead by trips to the post (according to Synergy sports, 120 times over), and free throw attempts.  And for the first time in recent memory, we saw LeBron publicly concerned about issues beyond his brand, such as the murder of Trayvon Martin.  This unapologetic performance clearly cemented LeBron as a Diss player.


But then again, Andris Biedrins, who is LeBron James' opposite in nearly every single way, is a Diss player as well.  If you go by Wins Produced, LeBron James is the most valuable player in league.  Andris Biedrins is among the league's worst.  No one's PER has taken as big of a drop as Andris Biedrins over the last three seasons, and he's increasingly found his name besmirched due to sexual and financial transgressions.  Yet, it is his failure to launch that makes him so beloved, in a strange, esoteric way.  One can't help but pity someone who can't seem to catch a break, or who has clearly been affected by some sort of mental trauma that affects their professional life.  Biedrins clearly isn't lazy (though given his proclivity towards missing games, one wonders about his conditioning), but something has happened that changed him, as a professional basketball player, forever.  It is that precipitous fall, and the unknown of what's to come, that makes him a Diss player, and one we are happy to give our attention and generate analysis.

Perhaps the best way to point out who are Diss players is to focus on players who have the skillset that we, as Diss-cussants, look for, but for whatever reason, have not found the professional or personal inspiration to put them all together.  This doesn't necessarily mean the player is a bust -- far from it -- but it does mean that the player could become more Diss-friendly, and enter the pantheon of Diss players (as it is an honor bestowed to so very few), if they became outspoken in some aspect of their game, or life.  If that's unapologetic scoring, great.  If that's untapped potential, fine.  If it's steady contributions, and a staunch, outspoken unwillingness to be anything but themselves, right on.  But now is the time to show us.


We implore these players to get started for two reasons.  The first is that, simply put, it's time to get started.  According to statistics from the RAM financial group, the average NBA career lasts about five seasons.  The NBA is a highly competitive field, and it takes a lot of hard work and luck to distinguish yourself above others.  It's important to not waste too many years figuring it out.  Secondly, by finally becoming what we want them, as fans, to be, we can get a better understanding about what statistically and intrinsically constitutes a Diss player, and do a better job cataloging their existences here on the blog.

Selfish?  Perhaps.  But only by understanding them can we better understand ourselves.  And there's no shame in being a Diss player.


Monday, September 24, 2012

Monday Media: A Journey Through My Shameful Past

Monday Media: A Journey Through My Shameful Past

For the most part, I've always been pretty secure. I know who I am, for the most part I like who I am, and I don't worry too much about what others think of me. I've been like this for as long as I can remember, even during awkward adolescence (read: middle school). I only have a couple of memories about not being "cool" enough.

The most distinct of these is centered upon basketball shoes. In 6th grade, anybody that was cool had either a pair of Reebok Answers or Paytons. Outside of Air Jordans (are they even called that? are they just Jordans?) and Starburys, those are still the only two basketball shoes I can recognize on sight, and man did I want them. Nevermind that my basketball playing career started and ended in a YMCA gym a few years before, or the ridiculous way in which kids would take rolled up pairs of socks and stuff them inbetewen the foot and the tongue of the shoe. I hadn't ever felt, and haven't since, such feelings of inadequacy from not owning a product. I remember the jealously I felt when I saw Jeff Kobernus chasing Brad Amaral (I think the divergence in their respective lives is interesting) around after-school one day in his brand new Paytons. Jeff yelled out for Brad to stop, sat down, took an old pair of Paytons out of his backpack and put them on, and resumed chasing Brad. My mom wouldn't spend more than about $50 on a pair of shoes for me, let alone two pairs.

All of this to say that I know sneaker culture exists and at one point I would've given my left arm for a pair of shoes, but I am certainly not a part of this culture. Like any niche activity (and collecting shoes isn't very niche), there is a part of the internet dedicated to it, in this case Kix And The City, an "online magazine dedicated to sneaker culture". Because, you see, Sneakerheads are just like the rest of us, using the internet to get obscene details about a product before searching for that shady-looking website where you can get it for $4 less than Amazon. Hell, I'm surprised sneakers.woot.com doesn't exist yet.

Not being apart of sneaker culture, or even fully understand it, I'm going to do what humans have been doing for centuries: make fun of something I don't really understand! The video below is hilarious. Never have I felt like my vocabulary was so inadequate as listening to this dude describe a shoe. Why is there an eleven minute shoe review video where we don't even see the shoes for 4 minutes? What the fuck is flywire, and why does this dude known exactly when Nike introduced it? if the "full-length zoom air visible air unit" is a first, what was the inferior technology we had previously? a partial-length zoom air visible air unit? How does Nike+ track my fuel, and what is my fuel?

I just can't get enough of this video. I'm also continually impressed by Nike's marketing, and how they basically have an entire culture based around coveting their products. Well done Nike marketing.

Monday Media: A Journey Through My Shameful Past

Monday Media: A Journey Through My Shameful Past

For the most part, I've always been pretty secure. I know who I am, for the most part I like who I am, and I don't worry too much about what others think of me. I've been like this for as long as I can remember, even during awkward adolescence (read: middle school). I only have a couple of memories about not being "cool" enough.

The most distinct of these is centered upon basketball shoes. In 6th grade, anybody that was cool had either a pair of Reebok Answers or Paytons. Outside of Air Jordans (are they even called that? are they just Jordans?) and Starburys, those are still the only two basketball shoes I can recognize on sight, and man did I want them. Nevermind that my basketball playing career started and ended in a YMCA gym a few years before, or the ridiculous way in which kids would take rolled up pairs of socks and stuff them inbetewen the foot and the tongue of the shoe. I hadn't ever felt, and haven't since, such feelings of inadequacy from not owning a product. I remember the jealously I felt when I saw Jeff Kobernus chasing Brad Amaral (I think the divergence in their respective lives is interesting) around after-school one day in his brand new Paytons. Jeff yelled out for Brad to stop, sat down, took an old pair of Paytons out of his backpack and put them on, and resumed chasing Brad. My mom wouldn't spend more than about $50 on a pair of shoes for me, let alone too.

All of this to say that I know sneaker culture exists and at one point I would've given my left arm for a pair of shoes, but I am certainly not a part of this culture. Like any niche activity (and collecting shoes isn't very niche), there is a part of the internet dedicated to it, in this case Kix And The City, an "online magazine dedicated to sneaker culture". Because, you see, Sneakerheads are just like the rest of us, using the internet to get obscene details about a product before searching for that shady-looking website where you can get it for $4 less than Amazon. Hell, I'm surprised sneakers.woot.com doesn't exist yet.

Not being apart of sneaker culture, or even fully understand it, I'm going to do what humans have been doing for centuries: make fun of something I don't really understand! The video below is hilarious. Never have I felt like my vocabulary was so inadequate as listening to this dude describe a shoe. Why is there an eleven minute shoe review video where we don't even see the shoes for 4 minutes? What the fuck is flywire, and why does this dude known exactly when Nike introduced it? if the "full-length zoom air visible air unit" is a first, what was the inferior technology we had previously? a partial-length zoom air visible air unit? How does Nike+ track my fuel, and what is my fuel?

I just can't get enough of this video. I'm also continually impressed by Nike's marketing, and how they basically have an entire culture based around coveting their products. Well done Nike marketing.

Sunday, September 23, 2012

Your Annotated Smartphone Bathroom Reader for Sunday, September 23, 2012.

Your Annotated Smartphone Bathroom Reader for Sunday, September 23, 2012.

No one at The Diss is really in love with J.R. Smith (yet), but this edition of the Reader belongs to him.

J.R. Smith Thinks He's a Bargain, is Kind of Right, but Also Might Not Know What a Bargain IsDan DevineBall Don't Lie
It's a really long title, so it must be a Ball Don't Lie post.  In this piece, Dan Devine looks into a recent quote from Knicks shooting guard J.R. Smith where he claims the Knicks are getting a bargain because he works hard, whether he's playing for "one dollar" or "$20 million dollars".  Devine skillfully agrees and disagrees, and uses some nifty advanced stats to prove his argument.  While Smith is a bargain if you believe in Win Shares, a stat that assess a player's individual contribution to a winning effort, and divides total paid salary by the number of available wins in a given season, he is not a bargain if you go by his defnition of a bargain, which doesn't account for salary.  Indeed, it makes a difference whether a player is being paid a dollar or twenty million of them.  A bit nitpicky, but good weaving of advanced stats and writing by Mr. Devine.

- JG
Fear of a White Planet, or The Whiteness of the WolvesBenjamin PolkA Wolf Among Wolves
Author Benjamin Polk says it best: "almost nobody has failed to notice and remark upon the Wolves unconventional racial make-up" this coming season.  He's right; it's somewhat unique that of the twelve players slated to get meaningful time on the 2012-2013 Timberwolves, nine of them are white.  He's also correct that this, for some reason, is a big deal, but we're not really sure why.  Polk asserts that the reasons people (meaning: Wolves fans, which I would consider myself to be a liberated member) are self-conscious about the whitewashed Wolves are two-fold.  Firstly, we, as purveyors of the sport, have not come up with a unified definition of what a "White" player actually is in the modern NBA.  Secondly, because NBA teams have become a "locus of black expression", it is discomforting that this NBA team, at least for this year, will not be one.  As such, there are persisting feelings of anxiety and angst regarding a team that fails to fit neatly into what we conceive as "white" -- indeed, there are elite white scorers (Love) defenders (Kirilenko) and dunkers (Budinger) on the team -- as well as what "not black" in today's NBA.  Polk does a good job looking back into American history, and identifying groups that were not always considered to be white (Slavs, Jews, etc), to show how this confounds us, and our stereotypes, today.  This is one of the smartest articles written this year, and a must-read for those who are interested in the way race and our "cultural imaginations" work to categorize players and styles in the modern NBA.

- JGMaybe David Stern Isn't That Bad After AllTom ZillerSBNation
A year ago, Tom Ziller (like just everyone else) was spewing vitriol at David Stern, who at the time, was doing the owners' bidding and locking out players (and team and arena employees) until a new collective bargaining agreement was reached between the league and the player's union.  But in September 2012, with the NFL referee lockout showing no sign of resolution, and the NHL staring down another lost season, Ziller is beginning to wonder if The Commish is so bad after all.  Ziller asserts that the chief difference between Stern and Roger Goodell and Gary Bettman (his counterparts in the NFL and the NHL, respectively) is that while Stern acts like he doesn't care about the players and fans, but actually does, Bettman and Goodell actually don't care at all.  He may have a point, considering the Bettman seems ready to lose another full season in order to bust the NHLPA, and Goodell is perfectly willing to use replacement refs for the long haul in order to save some money.  Ziller is correct: for all of his shortcomings, Stern has done his best to do damage control in the face of labor stoppages, and get everyone back to work as soon as possible.  We'll see if this general feeling of goodwill persists into next season.

- JG
The Miseducation of J.R. SmithJonathan AbramsGrantland
A few years ago, while sitting in an auto body shop waiting for my car to get repaired, I read in a Sports Illustrated article that the player other NBA players would pay to see play was J.R. Smith, who at the time, was coming off the bench for the Denver Nuggets.  That struck me, since, at the time, I hadn't really heard of J.R. Smith.  Since then, he's become a cause celebre for journalists and bloggers to rally behind when crafting retrospectives about the "Prep to Pro" era that produced more Robert Swifts and Qyntel Woods than it did Kobe Bryants and Kevin Garnetts.  The general consensus is that J.R. Smith has all the potential to be an All Star-type player, but has not reached this said potential.  The question is: why?  Jonathan Abrams investigates this question, and attacks the enigma that is Earl "J.R." Smith III from multiple angles.  Using perspectives from a number of people who have worked directly with Smith, including his father, a number of his high school and professional coaches, and J.R. himself, we are given a narrative of Smith that explores his carefree, frustrating personality traits, while at the same time, assesses how his gifts have been used, and how effective they have been over his career.  This is an excellent biopic into one of the league's most compelling players.

- JG More Lockouts as Companies Battle UnionsSteven GreenhouseThe New York Times

Is it possible that smaller businesses and corporations are learning new union-busting tricks from professional sports leagues?  Steven Greenhouse argues that they are, and reports extensively about a management practice that, once unheard of, has now become a popular tool to gain an advantage at the bargaining table, and marginalize the power of worker's unions.  According to Bloomberg BNA, lockouts have provided a record number of labor stoppages, with 17 employers (and perhaps more) who locked out their regular employees and told them not show up at work until they agreed to concessions at the bargaining table.  Strikes, meanwhile, are falling out of practice as a labor practice, due to declining memberships in unions, and fear of lost positions and wages to replacement workers if regular workers walk out on their jobs.  With unions facing serious challenges to their organizing and bargaining power, it will be interest to see if lockouts become a widespread union-busting technique from employers who want to wrest more bargaining power from workers.

- JG

Friday, September 21, 2012

Diss Guy Miss Guy, Volume 11

Diss Guy Miss Guy, Volume 11

Diss Guy: Derrick Rose


We're awash in a new era of basketball where all of the players have known eachother since they were 14, force trades to particular teams to play with their friends, and dance around together. But not Derrick Rose. Like another member of the 2008 draft class, Russell Westbrook, Rose seems to be cut from a different cloth. Whether he is icily standing while everybody around him is dancing, or looking supremely uncomfortable throughout the listing of his accomplishments at a marketing event, Derrick Rose has always been different.

Derrick Rose has always been this way. In high school he chose his jersey number to honor a former player at his high school murdered by a gang in 1988, four years before Rose was even born. And so when Rose is at home in Chicago during the offseason, and sees his city falling apart around him, like his fellow Chicagoan Lupe Fiasco, it affects him deeply.

For a hot second I thought of designating Rose the Miss Guy because, c'mon, he cried at a marketing event. And if this were LeBron James, or Kevin Durant, or practically any other player, I probably would've. But not Derrick Rose.

Miss Guy: Channing Frye

This is a little different than our usual Miss Guy of the week. Frye hasn't done anything hilarious, stupid, or even hilariously stupid: dude has an enlarged heart. Like Jeff Green last year (though he had an aortic aneurysm, a different condition) we aren't likely to see Frye in uniform this year.

I've liked Frye since his University of Arizona days, when he was on a series of entertaining teams that seemed like the perfect blend of Larry Brown "play the right way" and early 1990's UNLV Runnin' Rebels. It has been fun to watch him embrace the fact that he is a 6'11" dude that is most comfortable sitting in the corner hoisting up threesâ€"I really wish we could've seen him on one of the good versions of the SSOL Suns.

So Channing Frye, you are this week's Miss Guy of the week because I'm going to miss you this season. Get well soon.

Thursday, September 20, 2012

Minimalism: Not Just a Word Your Art History Friends Use

Minimalism: Not Just a Word Your Art History Friends Use


Apple generates hype like no other company. There are many websites that pay salaries to writers solely to track down rumors about Apple’s upcoming products. There is a market for rumors a day before the damn product will be announced! I bring this up because it seems that NBA marketing teams are taking cues from Apple. The biggest fervor surrounds the uniforms of the newly minted Brooklyn Nets. We have supposed leaks from video games, leaks from figurines, and leaks from “insider” Twitter accounts.

Now, there isn’t nearly the demand for uniform news for there to exist independent outlets covering it (Paul Lukas be damned), so instead NBA marketing teams are creating it as best they can. The Phoenix Suns have been slowly leaking images of their new court on Twitter (maybe I’m just naive, but who cares what the court looks like?) and the Knicks sent Amar’e Stoudemire to a talk show to unveil their new duds. Perhaps this uniform thing is turning into a big business.
Apple’s embargo and media strategy isn’t the only trend that NBA teams are following. All of Apple’s products are exquisitely designed, without a superfluous part. While design is not as applicable to jerseys, which serve a singular purpose, NBA teams have been following Apple's lead in designing minimalist products. Paul Lukas touched upon minimalism in the designs of the new Spurs and Nets jerseys, but the trend runs much deeper than that. One only needs to look at the jerseys of the Bobcats, Knicks, and Suns, and I bet as more jerseys are leaked we will see other teams embracing it.
The reaction to these jerseys hasn’t been uniformly positive, but everybody seems to be glad that teams are moving further and further away from some of the monstrosities of the late 1990s/early 2000s. Before fans breathe a sigh of relief, I would take a moment to check out the history of the evolution of uniforms, because this isn’t the first time minimalism has been in vogue; many of this year’s uniforms seem like they are paying homage to the mid-1980s/early-1990s jerseys.
Detroit Pistons



Golden State Warriors



The sequences of images above show why I would hesitate to say that uniform designers have embraced minimalism because of its own merits, and instead argue that it is simply a reaction to the uniforms that came before. I mean, while I think we would all acknowledge that the Nuggets uniforms in the 1980s were downright amazing, it is no surprise that the uniform that followed was pretty boring.

For insight into the future, go look at college uniforms, where Oregon has long embraced the wacky.  Lest you think this is only a football thing, the Cincinnati Bearcats vehemently disagree. Given the history of uniforms, I would think that in about five years Nike, Reebook, Adidas, or whoever is supplying NBA uniforms in 2017 will hire a new designer who throws around words like "bold" and "cutting edge". This designer will decide that two-tone jerseys with a city name are boring, and what the NBA needs is just a little bit of color. Maybe he grew up in Toronto in the mid-1990s and has a fetish for cartoons mixed with purple, pinstripes and godawful font. Either way, whether you think uniform minimalism is boring or the high-water mark of design, don't expect it to stick around.

Wednesday, September 19, 2012

Wild Speculation and Outlandish Guesses: Let's Play Some Damn Basketball Edition.

Wild Speculation and Outlandish Guesses: Let's Play Some Damn Basketball Edition.

Jeremy Lin reentered the news this week when he asked to sleep on new teammate Chandler Parson's couch. That's the only excuse we need to talk about him! How will he fare in Houston?


John Reyes Nguyen: Jeremy Lin is better off in Houston than in New York. As a Knick, the fans will want Linsanity all the time and that's just not going to happen. He's a good point guard but he's not a player who can turn around a franchise, which is what the Knicks need. I think he will be fine in Houston, probably averaging 13pts, 8ast, 3turnovers per game. Unfortunately, Houston's gonna be really terrible for a while so that will hurt his stock too.

Jacob Greenberg: I think he'll put up nice numbers (around 20 and 8?), but Houston will be nowhere near the playoffs. He also stands a decent shot of getting voted into the All-Star Game as a starter by the fans.

Andrew Snyder: Hopefully, Lin will average 20-7-12, carry the Rockets to the #1 record in the Western conference, and proceeds to break internet basketball culture as we know it.

Franklin Mieuli: Depending upon how you feel about Kevin Martin and Omer Asik, Jeremy Lin might just be the Rockets best player. His usage rate will be very high, meaning he will get a bunch of assists, but also a bunch of turnovers. He rose to prominence while Melo was out and his usage rate was off the charts. Therefore, I think that while Lin's advanced stats will show him to be having a decent year, he's going to average something like 20 points, 5 rebounds, 7 assists and 5 turnovers a game.

After not receiving any contract offers, Brian Scalabrine turned down an offer to coach the Bulls in order to do media work with the Celtics. What are your thoughts on the end of White Mamba's playing career?


John Reyes Nguyen: It's about time. Too many guys making a living in the NBA by being a "Locker Room Guy" and the first person off the bench to high five the players.

Jacob Greenberg: When you earn over $20 million over your career, you must be doing something right. I like him as a broadcaster and think he'll probably get picked up by one of the national affiliates in the near future. We haven't seen the last of White Mamba.

Andrew Snyder: This roundtable is right in my wheelhouse! Scal was a Celtics legend, and having heard him as a guest commentator before, I'm pretty sure he's going to be great in his new role -- who knows, he could slowly morph into the next Tommy Heinsohn! Maybe they'll settle down together, film a reality show, and then Tommy can finally have another "redhead in Needham."

Franklin Mieuli: I just don't get it. I don't get the internet's fawning love of Scalabrine. I mean, did he really ride middling basketball skill and red hair that far? I don't find him that interesting, and I just don't really care.

The New York Knicks offered their D-League head coaching job up to Patrick Ewing, which insulted the big man. Does he have cause to be upset?


John Reyes Nguyen: Do the Knicks really owe him anything? It's not like their head coaching position is available, at least not right now. And the head coach determines who's on his staff. Seems like they tried to bring him back to the organization the only way they can by offering him the D-League position. He's not done paying his dues.

Jacob Greenberg: I mean, he has been an assistant coach for several years now. But plenty of assistant coaches never get head coaching jobs, or have to wait a long, long time before they get a crack at it. Tom Thibodeau was an assistant for 23 years before he got a head coaching gig. I think Patrick feels like he's entitled a job because he's an all-time great player, and did good work with Yao Ming and Dwight Howard. If he really cares, he'll keep working, and something will come up.

Andrew Snyder: I think Ewing definitely has the right to be upset, although without any insider knowledge, I really can't speculate how deserving he is of NBA head coaching jobs and interviews. Maybe this just shows how big of a joke the D-League really is...

Franklin Mieuli: No. His one possible claim to fame is coaching Dwight Howard to stardom, and even that is dubious as Howard's talent was evident (and blossoming) before Ewing came along, and because somehow after 5 years of coaching by Ewing, Howard still doesn't have that good of a post game. Ewing needs to shut up and take this opportunity.

Rumor has it Bill Simmons and Stan Van Gundy will be joining ESPN's studio show this year. Thoughts?


John Reyes Nguyen: If Bills Simmons talks as much as he writes, it'll be a disaster. Sounds interesting, but Jeff Van Gundy is better.

Jacob Greenberg: I'd prefer if they called games, but sounds good to me.

Andrew Snyder: Oh baby. As a Simmons reader since before you were (Child of Boston... what's up Page2!?), at least I think I've got all the credibility you could ever need to answer this question. I've slowly listened to Simmons transform from a B.S. Report train wreck into a solid pod-host. Is that a word? However, he's has been wildly inconsistent on TV, killing it on occasion as a PTI fill in, but also sounding awkward in the NBA booth doing something he has no business doing - color commentary. Ultimately, the role of a studio host is somewhere in between those two, and I'm interested to see where this goes. Simmons could be great, or he could be a trainwreck who can't stop talking about the Celtics, or bringing up self serving concepts only he cares about (the pyramid?) from page 273 of The Book of Basketball. On the other hand, Stan Van Gundy has been there done this - he'll kill it.

Franklin Mieuli: Very excited to watch Stan Van Gundy to commentate, as that guy has no problem saying what he thinks. As far as Simmons, I've been underwhelmed by his podcasts and TV appearances, so I'm not expecting much.